The top things you wish you could say at work: This post will have 2 entries, one nice version then the ‘wild’ version with the help of @KEMPSAIDWHAT and the #TMM we participate in every Tuesday morning on Twitter 

1. I can see your point, but I still think you’re full of shit.

2. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don’t give a fuck. 

3. How about “never”? Is “never” good for you?

4. It sounds like English, but I can’t understand a word you’re saying.

5. I see you’ve set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.

6. Ahhh, I see the fuck up fairy has visited us again.

7. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.

8. If you think your list of complaints is bad, just wait until you hear my list of solutions.

9. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door

10. But plagiarism saves time!

11. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.

12. I don’t know what your problem is, but I’ll bet it’s hard to pronounce.

13. When I want your opinion, I’ll give it to you.

14. I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.

15. I pretend to work, they pretend to pay me.

16. I’m not being rude. You’re just insignificant.

17. Thank you. We’re all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.

18. It’s a thankless job, but I’ve got a lot of Karma to burn off.

19. Tell me what you need, and I’ll tell you how to get along without it.

20. No, my powers can only be used for good.

21. Just because you’re necessary doesn’t mean you’re important.

22. You sound reasonable……time to up my medication.

23. I’ll try being nicer if you’ll try being smarter.

24. If you’re not a part of the solution, there’s good money to be made in prolonging the problem.

25. I don’t work here. I’m a consultant.

26. Who me? I just wander from room to room.

27. I’ll try being nicer if you’ll try being smarter.

Okay sugas, be sure to check back tomorrow as I give you a sneak peek into the craziness we participate in on Tuesday Mornings during @KEMPSAIDWHAT #TMM (#TuesdayMorningMeeting) these are complaints/suggestions we come up with off the top of our heads.


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