I’m so happy “wedding season” is ending!!! Proud to say I made it this summer without attending a single wedding, I turned down the invites mainly because I wasn’t that close to the couples inviting me, I knew them but not too well. But lets talk about these “expected gifts” when you are invited…
Listen, if you need people to “pay” or cover their costs for your wedding, it means you’re the one that can’t afford what you planned. When you invite people to a wedding you take on responsibility as a host.
The expense and the cost of the wedding is solely the responsibility of the bride, groom, and their families, and never the people who are attending. People give with their heart and do the best that they can. You don’t invite people to cover the cost of your wedding, guests are not expected to cover the cost of your wedding, its crazy to expect guests to cover the portion of the wedding you could not, or to help pull you out of the debt you’ve created.
A gift in any form is not a reimbursement, yes, weddings can be expensive, but they are as expensive as you make it! Hell, you can not invite people, have a smaller wedding and save yourself some money, some of you have a lavish imagination but a food stamp budget. Please believe if you ask what gift I’m getting, how much I can contribute (and I’m NOT in the wedding) anything about what I’m giving you, I will quickly decide not to attend.
Here’s the thing, if you can’t afford $200+ plate dinners, then you need not expect other people to. Don’t go broke trying to impress other people, act your wage. One of the tackiest things I have seen though, the couple who begin opening cards AT the reception to use the money to pay the vendors. That clearly shows you didn’t have the money to afford this event and just used those people for their “gift”.
You’re suppose to invite people to celebrate your marriage, not fund a wedding. Weddings have become less and less about celebrating a marriage and more about impressing & outdoing others with a wedding. Do you send the gift back if you get divorced? Maybe you should focus on the marriage instead of a production. Remember what it takes for some people to even attend your event, traveling, clothes, hiring babysitters, ect. Time is money so the fact that they came is enough spent, no one has to give you anything.
Alright sugas, go out in the world and tell someone some truth today dammit- Keep it sincere!