I’m writing this based off something I saw a gentleman post on twitter, that got a bit under my skin.
“You ladies have to let go of that hurt from another man who cheated on you years ago. Not all men cheat. Let it go.”
Okay, I am assuming the man that posted this has clearly never been in a really serious relationship or actually had his heart broken, because someone who had would understand what that pain feels like and as much as we would love to just “get over it” its not that friggin easy! I am not asking if a woman should let go, but more of a how dare you suggest and tell me what to do with my feelings. Understand it is our past experiences that help shape us into the people we become, heck something you may have learned or went through just yesterday can change how you think, feel and act today. As much as I agree that not all men cheat, understand enough do to make a substantial impact on how we view men and their ways. Gentlemen realize, we know beforehand that this is your tactic for a woman to lower her guard and to ‘trust’ you, but understand if we do take interest in you it is in no way because we believe that line. Telling a female to let go of something that could have severely hurt her is inconsiderate an insensitive. A bad breakup can strip a woman of confidence, trust and patience. So if you are trying to approach her and be the man in her life, sit back, stop rushing and help her build and gain trust in you while creating a relationship. When a woman goes through something like that if you want to be the new contender you need to show you’re different. Those who actually are never have to tell or convince people of what they are trying to sell.
That same gentleman proceeded to state : “I’m not like those other dudes, I wouldn’t hurt you.” Okay, at some point in every girls life she will hear at least once a man who swears he is different and not like the others. Well, newsflash, we’ve heard that before! So its not that different after all. Also, don’t tell a woman the type of man she deserves. She is well aware of what is needed in her future, and again everything flying out of your mouth just sounds like bull. 9 tines out of 10 you’re just describing yourself or the man you want her to believe you are. actually you saying this is just insulting who she is, reminding her of any bad decision shes made and telling her how she should run her life. Again, here dear sir take a step back. The whole game of the gentleman is to show & prove, talk is cheap.Be wise of your words so you never have to eat them later, because while youre telling a woman what and how to feel, another man will be showing her.
I think his wording was incorrect but at the same time why even date or jump in the scene to be dated if you aren’t over situations from the past. Taking the step to date again is acknowledging you’ve been hurt before and this time you will be smarter. I totally agree that women need to let go of the hurt from a man cheating on you and this is speaking as a woman who has been cheated on. Having this mentality going in has ruined any potential relationships you could have developed. Most of the hurt comes from the woman not understanding why she was cheating on. When you can get past the hurt of being cheated on and truly realize it was his lose because what glitters is not always gold, you will open yourself to find that special one.
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