You Forgot Your Common Sense

Well Sugas, I guess I’m at the point in life people think I should be considering marriage & kids- ain’t happenin!!! So I figured those of us who are tired of nosy relatives asking needed some snappy comebacks:

I was hoping to do something meaningful with my life.

Because I just love hearing this question.

Ya know, I’d rather be happy.

Once my parent’s insurance runs out and I have a medical need.

I’m not, because the premarital sex is just too much fun.

I’m actually thinking about waiting until I get pregnant—I’d love a shotgun wedding!

When marriage is no longer the sole cause of divorce.

When are gays allowed to marry in all states?

It gives my mother something to live for.

My fiance’ is awaiting his/her parole.

I’m waiting until I get to be your age.

It didn’t seem worth a blood test.

I already have enough laundry to do, thank you.

Because I think it would take all the spontaneity out of dating.

My co-op board doesn’t allow spouses.

I’d have to forfeit my billion dollar trust fund.

They just opened a great singles bar on my block.

I wouldn’t want my parents to drop dead from sheer happiness.

Whenever you’re prepared to pay for it.

What? And lose all the money I’ve invested in running personal ads?

I don’t want to have to support another person on my paycheck.

Why aren’t you thin?

when you are going to give up smoking/drinking/gambling.

I’m married to my career, although recently we have been considering a trial
separation.

I don’t believe in marriage.

At the rate this family divorces, I’d rather not take my chance.

There ya go Sugas, let me know if you have any other good ones!

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